I've been Tagged!!

I've only been on blogger for about 12 hours and I have already been viciously attacked by some "tag" thingy and by none other than my lovely wife aka the108. Typically I hate this chain letter type of bullshit, however, I feel this particular line of questioning is pretty cool and way more interesting than the type of garbage that floats around Myspace. It is not at all surprising to find a bulletin entitled something like "I Fucked a Goat" or "You will have your scrotum stapled to your inner thigh if you do not...." This type of shit is on Myspace daily and frankly these type of chain letters can go fuck themselves. Ok enough of the ranting, on with my answers....

LIST FOUR SENTENCES YOU'VE NEVER SAID BEFORE:
1. "I just can't wait to get my turn in the brilliant war in Iraq!!"
2. "You know, the Army really did a good job of organizing this mission."
3. "Hey, can you stick this red hot poker up my ass?"
4. "President Bush really has remarkable command of the English language."

LIST ANY NUMBER OF SONG TITLES THAT DESCRIBE HOW YOU'VE FELT THIS WEEK:
"Trouble" - Coldplay
"The Luckiest" - Ben Folds
"Fitter, Happier..." - Radiohead
"Let Down" - Radiohead
"Supply and Demand" - Amos Lee

IMAGINE YOU'RE HAVING THE IDEAL PERFECT DAY. WHAT FOUR THINGS WOULD YOU BE DOING?
1. Sleeping in with the108
2. Writing the greatest song of all time.
3. Watching Wal-mart's stock plummet into worthlessness and subsequently watching the reports of fat white businessmen pricks throwing themselves from their corner office windows in their enormous phallic fucking skyscrapers.
4. The Iraq war ends because all the soldiers spontaneously and simultaneously decide to stop following orders in Iraq and go home.

MAKE UP FIVE CREATIVE NAMES FOR A NEW ROCK BAND:
1. Irritable Bowel Syndrome
2. Don't Flush That
3. Nerds with guitars
4. Loose Douche
5. Rinse and Repeat

CONGRATULATIONS! YOU GET TO GO BACK IN TIME AND ENSURE THAT THREE SONGS WERE NEVER WRITTEN, THUS SPARING HUMANITY FROM EVER HAVING TO HEAR THEM. WHAT THREE SONGS WOULD GET THE AXE?
1. "Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue (The Angry American)" - Toby Keith
(note: Please shove your boot up your own ass you dipshit)
2. "God Bless the USA" - Lee Greenwood
(note: Upon hearing this song I now involuntarily vomit)
3. "Jesus Loves Me" - you know the one they use to brain wash little children
by repeating the damn song until you feel like you are in a Children of the
Corn movie.


Okay thats that.

Oh yea..... Fuck.

Poppin' the Blogger Cherry

So. Here I am.

I have followed my lovely wife into the blogger world and although I've had my shitty Myspace one for a long time, now, I want in on the action over here. Because I dig it.

Since this is my first post on here, I'm not going to delve into anything too serious. I highly doubt that there will be a theme to this blog at any point, just me and my ramblings about the world and what I think of it. I tend to be a cynic and a smart ass from time to time and I can't spell for shit, but bear with me. I'll try to pepper this blog with fun expose's on my wife and her ridiculous behavior if anything, just to drive her crazy and make myself giggle.

Here's a little background for whoever reads this and really wants to know what I'm all about:

I'm 27 and in the Army raising three awesome kids and expecting a fourth and final in July. Before I joined the Army, I was in college studying vocal performance with the ambition of becoming one of the great singers of the world. Then, reality hit and I started a family and got a day job in communications with Uncle Sam.

It's pretty weird being me and being in the military because I have very liberal views and pretty much detest our current administration and have a hard time dealing with this war-for-money thing we've got going on. People just don't really talk too much about it when you're in the lifestyle we are and it is such a change since we came from a place where we were surrounded by free thinkers and people with ideas. I basically went from a pot smoking, hemp wearing, tree hugging sort of guy to a shaved head and an Army uniform. My days of sitting on the beach with my bongo drums and my guitar were replaced with foxholes and sand.

I've hit some rough patches here and there along the way. It's hard trying to keep up with the ever changing life we have and it gets to you sometimes. I've let myself get so squashed by the unimportant and am just finding out how to dig my way back out. In the end, work is work, life is life and I have my family which is what really matters.

Is this blog post getting too heavy? I feel I should lighten things up by telling an ass joke or something although I think maybe that only works with the kids. And Kyra.

Just to warn you, I say "Fuck" a lot.

So, hopefully, now that I have gotten the nonsense out of the way, tomorrow I will have something witty/inspiring/most excellent to write about.

Until then....