Won't somebody save this rich bitch!?
In our current celebrity obsessed culture where weddings and the adoption of 172 babies from Africa trump the fact that our young and not famous Americans are being blown up daily, I feel we have neglected one person who is in desperate need of our help.
Poor Katie, you poor rich and beautiful brainwashed little thing.
Is it not obvious to anyone else that this woman is being held against her will by the formerly sane turned completely coo-coo for coco puffs crazy assed Tom Cruise? Does no one think that mabye we must all unite to reclaim this woman back to the world of the normal and save her from the couch jumping lunatic that believes that we all are possesed by the souls of centuries old alien ghosts?
For those who do not know, Scientologists in fact believe that we are in fact all possesed by the forgotten souls of aliens long ago murdered by some evil alien name Gorgonzola or some such bullshit. L. Ron Hubbard, thier prophet, apparently wrote the basis for this absurd belief in several works of science fiction that some klingon speaking trekkie freak decided was a damn good idea for a religion. Then they set thier sights on the weakest among us, the actors. These members of our society that clearly have deep rooted insecurity issues and too much money to blow on nonsence became prime targets for this cult. Tom Cruise and John Travolta fell to the clutches of this bizzare madness long ago and we can all asumme they are too far gone to be saved.
But Katie, Poor Princess Katie, it is not to late for her.
It is time for all the Star and Us weekly readers to put down their bag of chips and stop if only for a moment from living through the lives of the rich and fameous and band together to save this bright shining star.
DOES NO ONE REMEMBER DAWSONS CREEK FOR CHRIST SAKE!!! RISE UP AND REVOLT!!
SAVE THE BITCH..... I MEAN, SAVE KATIE HOLMES BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE! WE MUST FREE HER TO BE ABLE TO ONCE AGAIN LIVE A NORMAL RICH BITCH LIFE FULL OF ANOREXIA AND PRADA!!
Send your donations to the Free Katie fund to my paypal acount at dean.muchmore@us.army.mil*
*dean makes no claim that any funds will be actually used to do a damn thing.
posted by The109 @ 11:04 AM
6 Comments
6 Comments:
You know how I feel about John Travolta. Alien worshipping freak that he may be, he's still hot in my book.
Maybe someone will base a religion around Zyghov. That would be cool :-)
this is very very funny. i have referenced it on my own blog actually
Well, now that I know that they worship Gorgonzola...I might have to join. Gorgonzola rocks.
If she hadn't had a baby with him, there would still be hope, but now that they've created a future disciple, all your efforts to separate them will be for naught.
I'm inclined to leave her to her fate. Fool that she is.
Pretty though.
L Ron hubbard, it's unbelieveable that people eat that shit up.
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home